Kurai Ai

[Kurai Ai]

Name: Kurai Ai
Age: 15
Gender: Female
S.O.: Bi
Rank: Fanmade
Appearance: Long pink hair that reaches her feet, icy blue eyes, a scar on her right side of her torso, wears black and red headphones, shirt is a one long sleeved shirt that is red and black along with a skirt has two slits up the sides, and has four black bobby pins that she puts her hair.
Personality: Depends how people around her act, is often a quiet girl that just likes siinging, is sad when others show emotions that she is unable to show such as love, if someone is sad around her she becomes sad or will try to cheer them up, she often starts fights with people if she thinks they are doing wrong, has a strong idea of right and wrong, she often doesn't like people who have a big ego, and can be often violent when angerd.
Rp sample:
Kurai sat the small table and started to drink her soda when two other Vocaloids got up to the karaoke machine and began to sing a song she often sang when alone…The song was…She had to think a moment. Magnet, she thought quickly. She noticed the vocaloids were Miku and Luka. Her heart swelled at show of emotions, she soon stifled a sob. Wondering where she could hide, when a boy with pink hair put out his hand.
"I'm your knight in shining armor," He said and smiled. She put her in his and then he smiled. "May I have this dance?" He asked as he pulled her to her feet. He forced her to dance. "Who are you? I've never seen you here before." He asked her before dipping her.
"I'm Kurai," She said as she dipped. "I only come here once in awhile." She said as they danced some more. The way her skirt flittered around when she danced embarrassed her. Then before she could stop it, her eyes flickered open and there she lied in bed finding it was all a dream. Little did she know on her bedside table were the magnet headphones…
Code: regurgitated lemon tuna tarts

[Chloe]

Well you need to fix some things. Like mostly, you can't use Luki because that is not your character. Secondly you need to read the rules and get the code. And lastly please put some more detail, you may just be starting out but I wish someone was tough on me when I first started role playing. Now if you can fix those things Lyme would be happy.

[Kurai Ai]

Ok thx ^^

[Chloe]

Your still using the boy as a character. The boy isnt your character.

[dzetsu]

As for personality, can you please elaborate?

When you mention that her demeanor changes depending on who she is momentarily with, can you explain further? Does she adopt the habits of others? Does she become friendly when others are? Does she shy away from certain kinds of people?

I hope I don't sound intimidating when I ask these questions. I just want a better understanding of your character before I decide if it's acceptable or not.

In addition to that, even though it is but a roleplay sample, Chloe is correct; it's important to begin to practice adhering strictly to the use of your own character, or occasionally, the extras. But, no penalty, for the roleplay sample is only a sample of your writing style and work rather than an actual reply, so you don't need to change it if you do not wish to.

[Kurai Ai]

Ok thx everyone

[dzetsu]

Before I accept your character, I'll just run one thing by you. On this site, your spelling and grammar do not have to be perfect, but try running a spell check and avoiding run on sentences.

In addition, be sure to read and understand the rules, where you got your code. If you have questions or complaints about the rules, feel free to send me or the other moderator a message.

I'm going to run by your application with the other moderator so we can discuss and agree upon the acceptance before action is made. Don't fret; it won't take long and it doesn't mean there's much wrong with what you have.

[★D3su-Face★]

Jeeze you guys are getting harsh on the critique. xD

[dzets]

Well, I just don't want to accept characters without my sister, who is more passionate about roleplaying than I am, reading it at least once, actually.

[lyme]

Hey, is Kurai Ai still coming? Because I always accept anyways.

SO IN OTHER WORDS. ACCEPTED.